Last day in Paris!

Per wiki, my source of all information: Grief is a multi-faceted response to loss, particularly to the loss of someone or something to which a bond was formed. Although conventionally focused on the emotional response to loss, it also has physical, cognitive, behavioral, social, and philosophical dimensions.
I would like to amend this definition for myself as being “the loss of the bond I have developed with Paris.”
As we all know, grief has 5 stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. And I’ve had the pleasure of experiencing all five.

Denial
I was supposed to be leaving this coming Sunday to go back to the US. So, I’d been telling myself that this time was far far away and that I still had plenty of time to soak in Paris and its beautiful sights, streets, food, nightlife and people (both French and non-French – aka my lovely new friends). Unfortunately for me, lovely British Airways has decided to strike. Now upon learning the news that my flight could be cancelled and that my best option would be to re-schedule and leave earlier, I refused to internalize this option and instead went for a walk and ended up climbing the Arc de Triomph.

Anger
Upon my return home, I angrily called BA and cut my trip short. My poor roommate had to deal with my complaining (as well as the entire facebook community) over cutting 3 days. But damn it, those were 3 days during which I was going to go to Mont St. Michel, do some overdue shopping, throw in some more night outings, meet up with new and old friends explore more of Paris, oh and finally find my French boyfriend… Stupid BA! I don’t want to leave Paris this early. It’s unfair. Stealing 3 days from me is just not nice!
Bargaining
Ok, so now instead of nine full days, I only had 6. When does the strike end again? Half way into week one of classes in Chicago? I wonder if I can come back then? I don’t really need to attend week 1, do I? I could stay in Paris, in the apartment until the 31st? Right? No? Why not? Ok, so all silly ideas aside, I’m heading home 3 days early. 6 days. How do I cram everything in. Loire Valley? Check. Climb Notre Dame? Check. Walk to Eiffel Tower and back? Russian Saints exhibit? Louvre visit #4? Check and check again. Who wants to go to L’As du Falafel? Cassoulet? Dinner with friends? Drinks? Foie Gras? Last minute presents? Check and check and… As a good MBA student, I made a list. I then prioritized said list into must do’s and only if there is time. I then worked out the best walking routes to optimize my time… Ok, so I wasn’t that thorough… (well no, I was, I just don’t want you to think I’m crazy…)
Losing three days? I guess I don’t have time to go to the gym. I must make use of the time I have, so I’ll just walk around the city!
But wait, if I’m losing 3 days here, I’m gaining 3 in Chicago. Fine. I’m losing one day with friends here. Well then, I’m going to line up breakfast, lunch and dinner plans for when I return. One day less of sightseeing here? Well, it’s no Tuileries, but the park north of the river in Chicago will just have to do for a walk. Maybe I’ll even rent a bike and ride it all the way to Kellogg ;) Maybe that will be my new Eiffel Tower.

Depression
While I was walking down the river Seine, I was overwhelmed by my love and passion for all things Paris. But as I went to my favorite places for a last time (as the Russian superstition says, never say last time, just last time during this trip) I was overwhelmed by a new thought. I was going home. And as happy as I am to be seeing my friends, this is the last time I’m eating L’As du Falafel, or having cassis Berthillon ice cream, or… you get the picture. And as I walked down the Pont des Arts, I even got misty eyed about not seeing couples making out everywhere once I’m back in Chicago. Even walking up to the 5th floor of my apartment (this is the French 5th floor…) I got… oh who am I kidding, this is one of the things I am super excited! Elevators here I come!

Acceptance
I’m going home. Paris, this has been one of the most amazing experiences of my life and I’ll miss you, but I have amazing memories of the last 3 months. While it’ll never be the same, it’s not my last time here. And in Arnold’s words, “I’ll be back”. I’ll bring my friends and I’ll take them to my favorite spots. Someday, I’ll bring my husband, and we’ll put a lock on the Pont des Arts, throw away the key and make out (on the metro). And, one day I’ll bring my kids, and I’ll show them where their mom used to walk and introduce them to L’As and Berthillon, and make them climb up Notre Dame to see the gargoyles (and of course, I’ll dress them in adorable French clothes!)
I have to bid au revoir to my new friends (in the French style, with kisses, of course!), but I can’t wait to hug my wonderful friends back home hello and catch up with them about the last three months and make more memories in Chicago! I guess it’s time to leave this magical forest and return to the rest of the fairy tale.